Scattered in shattered pieces Along the path of a dangerous journey
That left me damaged and broken
Nothing to find hope in.
when he decided to claim my body as his own without my permission
I lost sight of who I was
and began to listen
to the voices of the enemy
Telling me to question what I’d always know to be true
Telling me God doesn’t care or this wouldn’t have happened you you
And when I no longer could separate those voices from that of my own
I found myself seeking a different kind of love than one id ever known
And when his sweet nothings and gentle I love yous
Turn to lies, betrayal black eyes and hidden bruises
I excepted what I thought I deserved
Every word he whispered, every fist he lifted
They defined my worth
And when Loved morphed to fear and fear to hate
I thought about running away but still I stayed
So I wounded my flesh as he had wounded my spirit
because the paint on the inside was so heavy I couldn’t bear it
And to escape my reality I found refuge in whatever substance could lift me out of the
The whole of despair that I had made my home
I felt alone
And when addiction and abuse
crumbled my world into unrecognizable pieces
I had nothing left to do
The fall to my knees and cry to God please
But I was sure he had abandoned me
Because I had abandoned him
I had turned away, fighting my battles on my own
And in my dark moment of desperation
I heard His voice
“ my child you have never been alone”
He wrapped me in his love as I called upon his name
Speaking to my spirit just because life’s been painful you don’t have to live your life in pain
Through jesus. love I began to understand I wasn’t defined by the hate that he controlled me with or the bruises that he left
Rather I was defined by a savior who loved me enough to give me his last breath
He said I was worth it
He said I had purpose
And I began to understand that all the moments in my life where I thought that I was alone
That his grace was theirs to staining me until I was ready to come home
And every chain of bondage that was captivating me
Could be loose in the name of Jesus for he died to set me free
I wasn’t a possession of his anymore as he had cultivated me to believe
For I belong to the only living God I am a child of the king
I knew that I had been made victorious and no weapon could prosper
As long as I stopped fighting alone and start fighting with my father
He took my scattered and shattered pieces and made me whole again
And when there was nothing left to find hoping I found my hope in him
Back to poetry.
